How to control your emotions
Emotional stability is something that we all seek. However, not a lot of us are able to achieve mastery over our emotions. Emotions are complex responses that are generated within us, either due to external or internal stimuli. However, most of us, have not read the user’s manual of our mind, or our emotions. Because of that, questions like “How to control your emotions,” have become like rocket science. In this article, we are going to simplify the working of the mind, and emotions, and understand that how to control your emotions? First we will understand that what is the mind, and emotions.
Say Hi To Your Mind
Our mind is nothing but collection of information coming from our genes, DNA, and what we gather from our senses. It is a huge storehouse of information, and our thoughts are a result of this information. Simply because, without data, we cannot think. For most of us, our identity becomes this mind and information, because without information and thinking, who are we?
Therefore, if our identity becomes information, then get ready for a storm of compulsive thinking. When we talk about how to control your emotions, then knowing what is happening within us, is important. Therefore, now we will understand what emotions are. (Read: Thursday Motivation)
The Feeling Factor
When we ask, how to control your emotions, then knowing emotions are a must. Because, we cannot control something, unless we understand their basic functioning. So, emotions are basically, the response of our body, in the form of chemicals. Due to our thinking, or external situational factors, our body releases chemicals which make us feel those emotions.
Some chemicals, like endorphins, make us feel good, while chemicals like cortisol, make us stressed. (Read: Why We Suffer Success?)
The Thought World
In fact, our emotions are only generated due to our thoughts, because the external world is also a thought. Confused, do you remember how we are able to see? Light falls on objects, gets repelled, creates inverted image in our retina that our mind processes as thoughts? Therefore, it can be concluded that, our emotions, are our body’s response to thoughts.
When we think of how to control your emotions, then it is important to know another fact. That fact is, our mind cannot differentiate between real, and imagined. For example: our body shakes, when we see ourselves falling in a dream. Therefore, whether our thoughts are self generated, or from external world, they both are same for the mind. Eventually, for controlling our emotions, we need to control our thoughts, but how? (Read: Science Of Sanatan Dharma)
No Stop Button
When someone asks how to control your emotions, they are basically asking how to control the mind and thoughts. Many of us try to stop our thoughts, but fail, do you know? Because: our mind has no stop button, but just an instant start one. The reason for this is, our identification with the mind, and thoughts. Therefore, every time we try to stop the mind, it runs even faster.
So what is the way out? Dis-identification is the key.
Dis-identify
Dis-identification is the only permanent way out, when we talk about how to control your emotions. When we withdraw this false identity, we stop giving power to our thoughts and emotions. This creates a distance between us, and our psychological process of thinking and feeling.
Information is something that we gather, and what we gather, can be ours, but can never be us. Our name was given to us, DNA and genes were passed on ,and we have no control over what the world shows us. Therefore, if we do not even have the freedom to chose our identity, being what we want becomes tough. (Read: Samadhi And Equanimity)
So Who Are You?
You are, that you did not gather. You can call it soul, god, consciousness or whatever you wish. But there is an intelligence, which experiences these thought and emotions. This is an unsullied by information intelligence, and operate beyond dualities of thinking.
We do experience this nothingness while we sleep, however, rest of the time, we are drenched in information. If we drop information the same way during day, then questions like how to control your emotions would never arise.
Therefore, next time you feel overwhelmed, do not control your emotions or thoughts. Rather, remind yourself, that you are not this, and stop taking it seriously. When you stop energizing your mind with identification and resistance, it will subside on its own.
Conclusion
This process of dis-identification, does not happen over night, but happens naturally during two situations. One, you have had enough, or two, you have understood the trap of information. Either ways, you will have no option, but to let go, and that is when, you will operate beyond information.
FAQs
To stop being overly emotional, it’s essential to understand the root of your emotions. Emotions are often a response to our thoughts and perceptions. By practicing mindfulness and becoming more aware of your thoughts, you can start to gain control over your emotions. Additionally, learning to dis-identify with your thoughts and emotions can help you detach from them, reducing their intensity.
Emotional outbursts are often a result of uncontrolled emotions. To stop them, it’s crucial to recognize the signs of building emotions and intervene early. Techniques such as deep breathing, taking a short break, or engaging in a calming activity can help diffuse intense emotions before they lead to an outburst. Additionally, practicing emotional regulation through techniques like cognitive reframing can help you respond to situations more calmly.
Calming your emotions involves recognizing and accepting them without judgment. Techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, and mindfulness can help calm your mind and reduce emotional intensity. It’s also helpful to engage in activities that bring you joy or relaxation, such as listening to music, going for a walk, or spending time in nature.
Turning off your emotions quickly is not a healthy or sustainable approach. Emotions serve as signals that provide valuable information about our internal state and external environment. Instead of trying to switch off your emotions, focus on understanding and managing them. Techniques such as grounding exercises, where you focus on your physical sensations, can help you manage intense emotions in the moment.
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